Update

I have lost about 8 pounds thus far. I am finally back under the 250 mark. :)

As usually seems to happen when I start to seriously exercise, I got sick. Boo! However, I didn't get AS sick this time. I recovered quicker. I am still not at 100 percent though. Todays workout kinda proved that. :-P

It's been 7 days since my last workout. I did 30 minutes instead of the usual 45 of interval cardio. I shortened it for 2 reasons: being sick, and also we're going to the fair, where we will spend the entire day walking all over the fairgrounds. I am going to try to go easy on the fair foods. Packing in some snacks, eating only when I'm hungry, and allowing myself ONE sweet treat. Oh, and water water water to drink.

Things I have learned from today's workout. I cannot work out on an empty stomach. I just can't do it. 30 minutes felt like an hour!!! And also that even in a weakened state, I can still accomplish a lot. I was a total phlegm-bot though. ugh!

I am looking forward to the fair. I've been studying my brains out for patho. I need to decompress a little bit.

My doctor increased my Celexa dose again. I am hoping that it quells the anxiety that has been creeping up. I totally blew a quiz I should have done well on because I was anxious and choked out. Just like the dosage calc quiz last semester.

Anyway, I'm off to the fair.

Results!!! Already?!?! :)

It looks like I have lost about 4 lbs of waterweight off the top! Which in and of itself isn't all that remarkable, BUT, it is showing in my appearance too, some. My ankles, which of late have been looking pretty puffy, look....well.... NORMAL! LOL! :) I think my tummy's a *bit* smaller too. A T shirt that is usually really tight, is now only somewhat tight.

Not to make a mountain out of a mole hill, but any noticeable change feels really good, and adds to my motivation to stick with this. It's a small victory, and I want to celebrate it.

I'm very happy rite now.

Rest day

Today I took a day away from the treadmill. My body finally got really sore, plus I had a day packed with studying and errands. So though I didn't do the interval cardio, I walked around a fair bit, at the farmers market, and again at Target.

I have also watched my food intake, haven't been grazing/snacking much today. Tomorrow I will get back to it, though. For tonight, though I am spent. All the work I put into studying patho today, study group with friends, just absolutely drained me. It almost feels like my brain got out of shape over the summer! :p

Stress is trying to creep back in... can't let it! Probably will turn in early tonight, and then try to work out when I get up tomorrow morning. Then study after I finish my workout. Maybe that will beat the stress back out of my head. The study group today was a little chaotic. We were all kind of at different points in the material, and trying to work together as a unit. Everyone is stressing about this first quiz. :-/

This isn't much of a workout entry, but since stress/fear is the mind killer, I want to get this out into the universe, so it doesn't hamper me or cause me to stray from my path. I hated how lost I felt. I hated realizing how much information I have lost in the intervening 3 years since I took A&P, especially since it is so fundamental to this class and its curriculum. It scares me a little. This class weeds people out. We have 6 people in our class that are re taking it because they failed out of it. I don't want to be in that number next semester. :( I have to get on top of this!

Ok... gonna breathe... relax... sleep on it, then see what tomorrow brings. Hopefully some clarity.

The Day After

I'm feeling pretty good today. Not that sore...in fact, I'm not sore at all. Does that mean I didn't work out hard enough? LOL! I counted my calories very strictly and I mark yesterday a success. I was able to stay in my calorie budget. Nights are going to be hard, though. I am a NOTORIOUS late night snacker!!!!! between 9:30 and 10pm I was DYING!! Or so it felt, at least. :-P My body was trying to tell me it was just SO HUNGRY!!! I just pushed through it, though. I didn't eat anything. Didn't even drink water!

Today is a brand new day. I am still feeling the surge of energy. I am still feeling motivated. These are all good things. I hope this continues long enough for me to see some results. If it doesn't, I will have to push/pull/drag myself through it.

I did a Google search last night trying to answer my own question about vegetarians and the Biggest Loser. I stumbled across an article that implied that Bob Harper himself is vegetarian.... I never would have known it... he's always hawking Jenny-O Turkey products and yogurt and such. I find that strange, and somewhat disappointing. :-/

Ah well. I will have to blaze a trail, I guess. :)

Goals I am setting. Target weight 167 lbs. I will do cardio 5 days a week, strength 3 days a week. Yoga at least 1-2 days a week... Not sure if that's overdoing it... I will strive for this, and adjust if I feel a need. And of course... NO MORE SODA!!!

D Is for Discipline....

I had an epiphany day before yesterday. It struck my awareness in a way nothing else has so far. I was sitting on my big overstuffed study chair reading my textbook, when I was struck with a massive craving for ice cream. I mean a SERIOUS jones. Like a smoker has for a cigarette! I have never experienced that before, and it caught me off guard. I chewed a piece of sugar free gum, which helped. I did end up succumbing to the call of the ice cream bar a few hours later though. Honestly though, I think that's the first time that I actually tested myself... Usually when I feel hungry or crave something, I eat it. I have never really actively tried to ignore my cravings. Which surely is a big part of why I'm in the shape I'm in now. I never realized just how MUCH of a hold food had on me.

That woke me up. My schedule has changed, I have more time to crack down and be hardcore about it. I woke up this morning and had a nutritious breakfast. I have only had coffee (in the morning) and water to drink today. I want to quit soda pop altogether. I had a Dr. Pepper yesterday, and that will be my last one!!! I need to find other substitues for the bubbles... maybe seltzer water or mineral/sparkling water will do? I will miss the bubbles so much! :( I have had fruits and veggies all day and I worked out on the treadmill for 45 minutes. Thank heavens I had a Nine Inch Nails concert video to distract me. My patho book didn't fit on the treadmill, and my mp3 was dead... :p but Trent Reznor and company on TV got me through it. The last 15 minutes were tough... I wanted to quit, but I didn't. I finished. I want to ride the success of today for a while.

I feel good. Maybe it's because I'm back in school and feel like I'm working towards something scholastically, so now working towards something personally is a good fit right now. It may be that I'm just tired of being overweight, tired of being upset about being overweight, time to put up or shut up. I will need a new sports bra though... the ones I have SUUUUCK! The girls were smashed but not supported... they still bounced painfully. :( (yeah yeah, TMI, I know :-P ) .

I found a calorie count site online that I like so far.... although some of the calorie counts are off or differ, so I'm keeping a paper food diary too, starting today. My daily caloric intake for weight loss is 1500 calories a day, so I am busting out with the measuring cups and spoons, and the food scale. Will try to drink water mainly, so I'm not adding calories with beverages. I'm guessing that trimming the 500 calories alone will help, but I guess with regular activity that will help too... I am just puzzled about it because the analysis section says that net calories should be a negative number, but I don't see how that's possible without doing 4-5 hour workouts a la Biggest Loser.
:-P The website is calorie count : www.caloriecount.about.com

Speaking of Biggest Loser, it's about to start up again. I am an avid watcher, this season I will workout while I watch and see if I can lose along with them. I'd really like to see a vegetarian contestant on that show. I'm so tired of all the diet/fitness/nutrition "experts" saying that you have to eat animal products to have adequate protein intake. I refuse to compromise on this point, and there has never been any positive role models or feedback for vegetarian/vegan athletes. Or am I just not looking hard enough? Hell, I'd do it myself... I'd audition so I could be the one (unless they have a no veggies rule up front), public humiliation be damned, if it would help matters! :p But school is my other big priority along with my own personal health.

I have quit smoking, I am feeling pretty good about things. I know I sound like the girl who cried wolf by now with all of these "I'm gonna do it!!!" entries... but I really think this will stick. I just have a feeling.

So D is for Discipline, I'm trying to clean house, in a manner of speaking. Clearing clutter, keeping things in order, and now trying to get back to my healthy beautiful self.